Puts to rest the adage "Only a face a mother could love" because beauty trumps everything.

You are only ugly if you are poor and a nobody. Remember old man Aristotle Onassis? He brought a wife who was the most famous woman in the world. (Jacqueline Kennedy's friend Eileen Slocum said: "He resembles a frog.") What about morbidly obese (and lady's man) Mexican artist Diego Rivera? Christina Onassis brought all her husbands, as did plain-faced heiresses Barbara Hutton and Doris Duke.

Why do I bring up these dead people? Because Penelope (Christina Ricci) is a wealthy aristocrat who lives in a fairy tale palace doted on by her parents and servants. They indulge every whim since they have never allowed Penelope to go outside. Her parents consider her a monster since she is the product of a family curse. She has a pig's nose and ears. Any mother would have said, "Penelope, I love your nose. And look on the bright side. You're not fat."

In the real world, appropriate suitors would be pounding at Penelope's door since one kiss and an "I Do" is said to lift the curse. If it doesn't work, there is always the guaranteed inheritance.

Her parents raised Penelope like Lord Siddhartha. He fled the gilded cage and we all know what happened afterwards.
Penelope's mother Jessica (Catherine O'Hara) is the real villain of this piece. Hey! She is not to blame but is disgraced and shamed of her only child. She constantly humiliates her daughter and insists on a parade of socially acceptable men (only one of her own kind can lift the curse) to meet Penelope. One look at Penelope and they jump out of a seven-story window!

Remember when E.T. went out on Halloween? Couldn't Penelope have worn a burqa or niqab like a million other women?

Did you ever see the Old Masters painting of Italian cardinals? They were proud of their prominent, crooked noses!

Because of the media assault on the family, Jessica decided to fake Penelope's death. Penelope was hidden away in splendid isolation but hunted after by a midget journalist Lemon (Peter Dinklage) who doesn't feel any sympathy for Penelope. When Edward Vanderman (Simon Woods), a broke aristocrat, cracks up at the sight of Penelope, he teams up with Lemon to expose the pig-faced girl. They find another penniless aristocrat, Max (McAvoy), to get a suitor "audition" and surreptitiously take a photo of Penelope for $5,000. Max is a degenerate gambler who likes to lose. He gambled away his fortune so he must have daddy-mommy issues. He really wanted to be a musician but wound up as a lousy poker player instead.

The constant shame Penelope faces from her mother and the suitors leads Penelope to put a scarf over the bottom half of her face and venture outside!

WOW! The sky is blue and the world is filled with people who pass her right by!

With her mother's credit card and unfettered liberty, Penelope meets Annie (Reese Witherspoon) who takes a liking to the naïve girl. Penelope, now with friends and a few beers in her, decides to go public. In no time, she is a celebrity like Paris Hilton. Famous for no reason!

This semi-charming tale, if only the mother-daughter relationship had been re-figured, is wonderful to look at and, yes, I did shed a tear. You will also.

It's all because of James McAvoy. So this is why he is being hailed as a likely Sexiest Man Alive!

His previous film roles %u2013 and I'm even counting "Atonement" %u2013 have not done him justice. He is very sexy, charming, and downright fabulous here.

Director Mark Palansky should be given credit for giving the movie audience the McAvoy we have been told about. And while some have complained to me about the various accents, I say, we live in an international world without boundaries. Plansky steers a superior team - cinematographer Michel Amathieu, production designer Amanda McArthur and costume designer Jill Taylor. The production is so wonderful you want to say, 'Penelope, you are better off at home in your colorfully-built dollhouse. Take your father's advice and get a puppy to love."

Except for the horrible mother, "Penelope" does send a heart-warming message to young girls, though it is a fantasy no girl over 5 years old would go along with. Stores are selling bras for toddlers and by the time a girl is 5, she's on a diet and saving up for Botox.

My weekly column, "The Devil's Hammer," is posted every Monday. The Devil's Hammer on FTB. If you would like to be included on my distribution list for a weekly preview, just email me at masauu@aol.com .

Victoria Alexander lives in Las Vegas, Nevada and answers every email. You can contact Victoria directly at masauu@aol.com  or by visiting www.FilmsInReview.com .

PENELOPE
Stone Village Productions presents a TYPE A Films/Tatira Active production in association with Grosvenor Park Media

Credits:
Director: Mark Palansky
Writer: Leslie Caveny
Producers: Reese Witherspoon, Scott Steindorff, Jennifer Simpson
Executive producers: Robin Greenspun, Danny Greenspun, Andrew Molasky, Chris Curling, Christian Arnold-Beutel
Director of photography: Michel Amathieu
Production designer: Amanda McArthur
Costumes: Jill Taylor
Music: Joby Talbot
Editor: Jon Gregory

Cast:
Penelope: Christina Ricci
Max: James McAvoy
Jessica Wilhern: Catherine O'Hara
Franklyn Wilhern: Richard E. Grant
Lemon: Peter Dinklage
Annie: Reese Witherspoon
Edward Vanderman: Simon Woods
Jake: Michael Feast

No MPAA rating
Running time -- 104 minutes