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The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 | Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner | Review

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1_Chicks_Small Judy Thorburn

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The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 1 marks the beginning of the end to this immensely popular film franchise based on Stephanie Meyers best selling series of books. There is only one more installment to go before this melodramatic, teenage soap opera is over.

If you haven't read the books or seen the previous installments, let me fill you in. The saga revolves around the love triangle between a mortal young woman, a handsome vampire and his rival, the more buffed werewolf. Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart) has chosen to be with vampire love Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) to the dismay of rejected and angry werewolf Jacob Black (Taylor Lautner) who has trouble moving on. When left off the last installment, Edward proposed to Bella.

Breaking Dawn Part 1, adapted to the screen by writer Melissa Rosenberg, opens with the subsequential wedding of Bella and Edward in a beautiful forrest setting, followed by a honeymoon getaway to a luxurious beach house on an secluded island off the coast of Brazil. They make love, play chess and frolic naked in the ocean; nothing that comes close to being really smoldering hot and sexy as anticipated.

The plot thickens when Bella finds herself unexpectedly pregnant and carrying a fetus that is so strong and growing at a rapid pace that it could kill her. What kind of a baby could this be? Is it a vampire, a grotesque half breed creature, or even worse, a demon ala Rosemary's Baby? Only time will tell.

Edward is fearful and distraught and even worse, incredibly stupid. After having been around for over a century, it makes no sense that he would not know the possible ramifications of not using birth control. On the other hand, after getting over the shock of her situation, Bella's maternal instincts kicks into high gear. She is determined to bring this “thing” into the world, even if it is draining her body, making her weaker by the day, and turning her into an emaciated, grey skinned victim of prenatal abuse. Since Bella refuses to abort it, there are outside forces that have their own plan in the works. Lucky for Bella, Jacob has not forsaken his one true love and is eager to protect her and the baby even if it means going against his family of wolves.

Like the prior installments, the action moves at a snail's pace. Oscar-winning filmmaker Bill Condon (Gods and Monsters, Kinsey, Dreamgirls) is at the helm, but he is unable to save this dull and boring movie filled to the rim with teen angst, bad dialogue, little substance and an irritating music soundtrack that was getting on my nerves. I don't even know what to say about the absurd birth scene that should go down in movie history. Bizarre, ridiculous, creepy, and laughable are few words that come to mind.

Stewart and Pattinson are still as wooden and unexciting as paint drying on a wall. For two people that are supposed to be happy and in love, they rarely smile, tending to brood and look like they are in pain and....and this is before Bella discovers she is in the family way with a who knows what.

Sorry, die hard fans, but I can't recommend this snore fest. Regardless of the millions who have read the books and go crazy over the movie adaptations, I have yet to grasp the appeal. Whether young women (and from the reactions at the screening I attended, plenty of older ones, too) get a kick out of this sappy romance/horror tale and think the lead stars are to die for, I couldn't care less.

There is mention by a minor character about “imprinting” on a potential soul mate, whch is a hint of what is to come. So far, this long and drawn out saga hasn't left a good imprint on me.

Part 2, the concluding chapter of Breaking Wind, I mean Breaking Dawn, arrives in theatres next fall.

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